Better or Worse?

I love Jesus Christ. Sometimes it just feels good to say it. I know that he loves me and that feels even better.

Today is my anniversary. I have been married six years to a woman I absolutely adore. It is strange to lay here in the hall with her during a thunderstorm so large the power went out and probably won’t be back on for sometime. The reason we are laying in the hall is I am deathly afraid of tornadoes and I want to be able to grab Alyssa quickly if needed. I hope it never comes to that. Situations like this always remind me of God’s awesome power and the amazing majesty he has created.

I always knew Julie would be a good mom. The kind that would lay outside her child’s door all night long in case he or she woke up scared. The kind of mom that would hold a child all night until the fever broke or the vomiting stopped. The kind of mom that would endure pain or hardship while singing praises to God. In fact it is one of the traits that makes me attracted to her. Her unwavering commitment to her family, her children, and to me, but never putting us before God.

When I repeated our vows six years ago, and I don’t remember exactly what I said, the line for better or worse was probably there. Its part of many vows but probably one line that people don’t pay alot of attention to. The in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer are pretty easy to grasp. But for better or worse is so broad, so ambiguous I suspect I didn’t give it a second thought. But today I get it. The broad category of worse contains many things: divorce, death of family members, loss of a job, and lots of others. Worse is the season where neither of you know what to say. Confused about how you feel it is easier to muddle through the day and hope that tomorrow brings about better. And if better doesn’t come tomorrow that’s okay, because I know that it will come some day.

There are hundreds of reasons I love my wife, but today I know this; my worse days are always better because she is with me. Even in the midst of our grief there times to laugh and talk, times to steal a kiss, times to share a meal, and times to enjoy being parents. I could not have imagined the blessings God would bestow upon me at my wedding day. The blessings of both my children and the blessing of my wife of faith are just the beginning. God is so good to me.

Today didn’t feel like a day of celebration but everyday has been a walk with God made richer, fuller and better because of my wife. For better or worse I love you Jugi. – Ethan

6 thoughts on “Better or Worse?

  1. And “Son”
    we love you so very much. We prayed our whole life for someone who would cherish our daughter and keep her close to God. God IS so good and we thank Him daily for sending you her way. I know that the times you both are in right now are so trying and yet I see you both holding on to each other and supporting each other – and together you are walking with your hands in God’s.
    Thank you for loving our Julie and making her so happy – and making her laugh so often.
    We are just a phone call away anytime.
    We love you, son!

  2. We saw you Sunday, and I admire you so because while I could see the heaviness of heart in your eyes, I could also see your strength. I appreciate you continuing your blog – it has quite a bit of soul-dumping as you struggle with the grief, and most importantly seek God in your experiences.

    It is heart-wrenching, and in some ways I know how you feel – my wife I lost two pregnancies in the 1st trimester.

    But I am encouraged by your words of faith as you emerge from your darkness.

    God bless,
    A.

  3. julie and ethan

    seeing your faith and your love for christ and each other inspires me to be a better person here on earth! thank you for allowing God to use your example and this blog to make me and others stronger soldiers for christ!

  4. We pray all is well. During the hard times and bumpy road, know that there are so many still thinking of your family and praying for you. May God continue to work in you and through you as an example for us all. We love you!

  5. Dear Ones,
    WOW at God for creating love, giving us one another to hold on to and who will hold on to us…even in the worst of times. I am so glad that God brought you 2 together!
    Because He Lives,
    C.

  6. Everything’s part of God’s amazing plan. He has a plan for all of us and He already knows every single detail of our lives. I think it’s amazing that He knows all of us by name.
    May God continue to support you through better and through worse.
    “For it is during the hard times that I carried you” – don’t forget that. Hold on to Jesus because he’s holding on to you.

    “May the Lord Jesus be a friend to all of you” – the best translation of the last verse in Revelation.

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