Noah’s 7th Birthday was today. There was no need to prepare the girls, because Alyssa has always taken care of that. She knows the day is coming and I hear her telling Audrey, “Noah is your brother. He is 7 today.” And they feed off of her excitement and really had fun decorating the house and celebrating this day.

For me, the day comes with sweet memories. God has done an amazing job of removing the pain from this situation and replacing it with joy and hope. I can truly say that. I know for many people, so close to us, this day is hard. They remember the sound of me yelling Noah’s name instead of his first cry. They remember watching the team of nurses rush in instead of them rushing in to see him. And there are others who met us after Noah and simply sympathize with us on this day. Friends who love us so much, that they love Noah as well. Oh, I am so blessed.

The day began as usual getting everyone dressed and off to school. As I am rushing the little girls out the door, I stepped back to the kitchen for something and noticed the time on the oven. 9:01. The time of his birth. The air quickly left my lungs as I was suddenly, unexpectedly overcome with tears. A few moments pass and of course I was out the door. It was a moment in time that I am deeply connected to. We ended our day with balloons and cupcakes, singing to heaven as though he was on the edge of a cloud listening. The awesome part of this is this story is real. It is not like Santa, where one day they will realize none of that can happen. There is no fabrication of the truth here. Noah is in heaven with our Savior. He is safe, happy and looking down on us. He knows when we love and celebrate him. And honestly, I believe he gets our balloons in one way or another.

I am going to walk through his story again each day.